Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Trying To Silence the Inner Monologue

Thank goodness for spell and grammar check.  It's late and my brain is fried so as I am typing I am ever aware of that little squiggly red line.

I am having one of those nights where once again it is quiet but I can't seem to shut my brain up.  It just wants to keep talking to fill in the silence that has fallen over the house.  I should have the tv on and be knocked out by now.

Clover still has the last bit of her flu and Hubby has now picked something up.  So lots of tea for the hubs and cuddles for the lil one and cuddles for the hubs and ice water or the lil one.  We are also midway through our house project.  Even though we have been in this house for about ten years we haven't tackled the great room with the vaulted ceilings because it just seemed like it was too big of a job.  We are currently working on that with some help of a contractor.  He's been wonderful and is very detail oriented.  It's all going to look so wonderful when it is done.  I just need to keep reminding myself of that.  The end result with far outweigh the inconveniences of the last three weeks.

One of them being the loss of Thanksgiving.  We usually host both families at our house for Turkey Day x2!  Both sides are a little two big to combine into one large party so we have lunch with one and dinner with the other.  Full Thanksgiving spread times two.  It's a good thing I love to cook!  This year we thought the project would be done in time.  It is not going to be done in time.  This didn't hit me until yesterday.  I was on the verge of tears as I called everyone to tell them we weren't going to be able to host this year.  I know it's only one day and our house is no where near ready to host anyone.  And I'm not talking about a Martha Stewart Thanksgiving kind of a host.  I'm talking about tape everywhere and no plates on the light sockets kind of a mess.  I have to mourn the loss of my day.  I miss everyone.  I now understand why Clover took it so hard.  I didn't understand last night while she was in tears but I get it now.  We both had high expectations and now that we have canceled we have to deal with that.

There are so many more things I need to update on and perhaps I will get a chance to do that tomorrow.  For now I just wanted to get some sentences out so maybe my brain will finally shut up so I can rest.  I do feel a bit sleepy.  I just need to keep looking past the trees to the forrest or however that saying goes.


1 comment:

  1. This title got me...I feel like I'm always trying to silence the monolog of life. Most of it seems to have negative, pity thoughts and I have to sit and talk against the monolog in my brain.
    Sorry about the Thanksgiving fiasco but on the bright side...talking against the monolog in your brain. You have a beautiful home that you are able to redo and decorate and just enjoy, you have a home to tear apart at a moments notice and Thanksgiving is but one day a year verses many days lived in a house you guys will soon enjoy again.
    Happy Thanksgiving friend!