Saturday, August 31, 2013

The Freak Out That Never Happened

I heard a lot of things about Clover starting the big K.  People were full of suggestions to make it easier.  Encouraging words from parents that had been there before and teachers that had been on the other side were heartwarming and helpful.  All of the other comments I had heard...not so much.  Just like any other time in your life, people are going to say something about it.  Sometimes these people mean well and don't realize what they are saying could be taken every which way but the right way.  Those people I have given the benefit of the doubt.  Cuz I'm nice like that.  Then there seems to be the group of people that increase the anxiety you didn't even know you had.

The not so positive things I heard before starting:

You are going to freak out.

Have you started panicking yet?

The guys at work are worried about what you are going to do once Clover starts Kindergarten.

YOU ARE SOOOO GOING TO FREAK OUT! (yes, all caps was necessary)

So let me just say that I am not really the freaking out kind of person.  I am usually pretty cool, calm and collected (most of the time).  There are times where I get upset, complain or vent.  But there have been few times I have freaked out.  I also have this glitch in my personality where I feel the need to correct people's opinion of me.  I have to prove them wrong.  I realize that this glitch has been around for awhile.  For example: my chemistry teacher in high school told me he didn't think I would get that far in the class.  I walked out of that class with a high B/almost an A.  So hearing that all I was going to do was freak out did the opposite.  I'm not sure if I didn't freak out because I really wasn't that worried or because everyone only told me that I was going to. 

I think the anticipation of Kindergarten was the worst.  Yes, I will admit I was a bit nervous.  Especially when I realized that her Kindergarten was indeed ALL DAY.  It was way easier to plan out the day knowing she would only be in class for three hours.  Oh how times have changed.  Having people to run my worries by helped.  There were a lot of people I reached out to that calmed my nerves down and I appreciate that.   

Clover was apprehensive at first.  Mostly because she thought she was going away to school.  Like boarding school.  I think she got this idea from Harry Potter.  So when we talked about school, she thought she was getting on a train and going away.  Preschool helped with this.  She finally figured out that we do come back for her every day and she gets to come home and sleep with her "babies".

Then the big day came and went.  We went down and dropped her off and she kissed us and waved us off.  The first couple of days we didn't linger.  I know from my teaching days that sometimes it confuses them and makes it worse.  The second day she kissed me and told me "I'm going to go and play with my friends Mom, you can go now!" and ran off.  I loved that she was so independent.  She has been from the beginning.  Part of me was a little sad that she didn't need me but I was glad that she was loving her new teacher and classroom.

The only hiccup we had was on the sixth day.  She asked me how many more days she was going to to have to go to school.  I let her know she had about 10 more months.  She looked a little shocked.  I think she figured out that it was a long term thing.  That morning she begged me to stay until the bell rang and got teary eyed when it was time to line up.  My heart broke.  I really didn't want to leave her.  But the grown up voice in my head told me that I had to.  I wanted to hover when she went into her class but I resisted.  So I emailed her teacher to check in on her instead.  Of course, she was fine.

I was pretty lucky that she adjusted pretty quickly.  She is my social butterfly so she loves making friends.  She even likes that she has classwork to do.  The one thing we need to work on is helping her to learn that it's not okay to interrupt her teacher.  All in all she is doing great.

Just in case anyone is wondering, I'm doing just fine too! 

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

To My Congressman/Woman or Person In Charge of These Things

You see I am a parent of a brand new Kindergartener.  Being that this is our first year I have some new observations.  I was a little shocked to see the new classroom sizes for this year.  Now, I have met our teacher.  I have seen her in action and I believe that she can indeed handle 33 five year old.  Buy my question is:  Can you?

You see, I also heard that this number is not final this year.  I also heard that you may increase this number.  So before you do this, I have a proposition for you.  Why don't you take a month off of your important law making job and put yourself in the teacher's position, fully.  Not observing or helping out.  I'm talking 100% the whole enchilada teaching.  For a month, you will be a Kindergarten teacher.  You will dry their tears when they miss mom and dad or wipe their snotty noses or tie their shoes, all of that now times it by 33.  And an added twist to the situation, you only get paid a teacher's salary.

I understand that you see education as a place where the budget can get cut.  I get that at the end of the day it's all a numbers game.  There is a larger argument to be made about how much we are investing into our future generation, which as a whole doesn't seem to be a lot.  But for the sake of making this short...I seriously doubt that by the end of my proposed month you will think that 33 kids in a classroom is a feasible idea.

Last Bit of Summer

Looking back I can't remember all the things we did.  It didn't seem like we did a whole lot but looking over the pictures it seems that we were busy enough.  And just like that it was all over.  We did manage to get two vacations in before we entered the official school year.

We took a break from our lovely weather and headed to the coast.  There is something about going over that hill and rolling your windows down to get that beach are in the car.  It was so calming until the redhead in the back seat started screeching about her hair.

That serenity that comes from being on vacation at the beach was quickly ended by the hotel informing me that they did not have my reservation.  I figured that I didn't need it since everything is digital anyways.  So the pdf I saved with my reservation number was on my hard drive on my laptop at home, four hours away.  Since we were only staying the weekend, I didn't bring it.  Why bother?  I was at the beach.  The hotel was very good about finding us another room.  They even offered us 20% off.  So we not only got a beach front room but at a better price than the regular room I had booked.  There was someone behind the counter mentioning that she couldn't find another reservation either so I think there was a glitch in their system.  But did that stop me from stressing out the entire weekend?  Of course not!  I spent the entire weekend thinking I had gone crazy.  One desk clerk mentioned that there was another hotel by the same name in Santa Cruz.  So I had to look up my credit card statement to make sure that I didn't book the hotel in a place we weren't even remotely close too.  So then I spent the weekend worrying about myself and my sanity.  Did I make the reservation?  Was I multitasking?  Is my focus not what it used to be?  Do I need to go back to the doctor?  So I tried my best to calm down.  Hubby was really good about the mix up but I couldn't help but stress that I almost ruined our first vacation of the summer.  So I stressed for three days.  I came home and opened my laptop and quickly searched for the pdf.  I found it in about three seconds.  And there in all it's glory was my hotel reservation a long with my confirmation number.  Even though it was their screw up the hotel did everything to make it right and we had a lovely weekend.  I was mad but more at myself for doubting everything and stressing out all weekend.  Some things you just have to learn how to let go.

I did manage to get some snapshots in.  In no particular order...

Our empty purple bucket.  

Feet in the sand picture.  But check it out I'm in a skirt!   

My favorite product of the Summer!  Neutrogena didn't pay me to say that.  It really is my favorite sunscreen.  I HAVE to wear it because even on a cloudy day I will burn!  I buy the four pack from Costco.  This stuff is nice because it is dry touch so it doesn't feel greasy at all.  I can't do greasy.  If there is anything on my skin I wig out.  It gives me the heebeejeebees.  Like wearing straight leg pants that hug my calves.  ick!   

Our bucket quickly filling up.  Clover hunted while I hid from the sun in our beach tent.  I hid from the sun so I don't end up a Crispy Fried Juju.    

This isn't another foot picture.  Well it is but it's more to point out that I was wearing a dress!    

The beach. 

What is a beach trip without a Cinnamon Roll?  Pecan roll with frosting!  Yum!  I shared and we still only killed about a quarter of it.  

It was pretty windy the whole time we were there.  So why not pick up a kite?
Hubby had vacationed there as a kid.  So it was really fun to check out all his old haunts and hear stories about his family vacations.  It was fun to share all of that with our daughter.  She was so excited to hear about Daddy when he was younger.  It was nice that we all got to connect before Summer came to an end and our baby started Kindergarten.  But that freak out is for another post.  Just kidding I didn't freak out!  Sort of.   

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

In Which I Totally Want To Throw A Tantrum

I tried.  I really did.  I tried to not let it affect my day.  I tried to be in a better mood but I just couldn't help it.  It sucks.  My day was totally destroyed.  I'm not sure it was destroyed.  More like the idea of what I thought today was going to be, was destroyed.  I handled it like an adult.  When in reality I wanted to handle it like a kid and whine, kick, scream, and throw a mega tantrum over it. 

Ice cream helped.  It seemed like an Cookies and Cream kind of a day.  Or if you are Clover or Grandma a Reckless Sherbert kind of a day.  They earned their ice cream.  They dealt with me all day. 

So Sunday, my tooth fell out.  It had been a bit wiggly and then just fell out of my head.  This tooth was the one I had the root canal on two years ago.  After my tooth broke in half I had a root canal and a shiny new porcelain crown put on.  It wasn't that bad of an experience considering that I don't even like dentistry.  It was kind of a big deal for me.  Then there is the money aspect.  I had to pay a percentage of the root canal/crown/dentist time.  Over all close to $1500 out of pocket.  Only to have it fall out two years later and currently sitting on my dresser in a baggie.  

So now I am having the hard sell put to me to get an implant.  But to tell you the truth I am so over it.  I'm not sure what I am going to do but I'm upset that I let it ruin my day.  I should have just accepted it and gone with the flow.  Which I usually do.  But for some reason today was different.  I couldn't let go of what I wanted today to be.  I'm not even sure why that was important to me. 

Do you think that if I put it under my pillow the Tooth Fairy will help reimburse my loss?